So, I’m not one to ride the popular topic wave. I don’t really talk about who I’m voting for. It’d be nice to be allowed get married and give blood, but I’m not holding my breath. But the thing I was to talk about, in not a wholly positive light, is kids. Like, gays having kids. 2 daddies and all that jazz.
Now, I’d like to be a father, to be like how my dad is with me, being there. It’s lovely, when I’m 30ish, settled down, hubby, the standard pipe dream. But is it such a good idea? Now don’t get me wrong, we deserve to have kids, just as everyone else does. Fuck the straights who say no, etc, etc.
Now, the reason I don’t think so, is that too many men spoil the child. I have a friend. One of many, if you will. Lets call his Rob. Now Rob has 4 older brother, in the 20s and 30s, while Rob himself is just 18. The mother isn’t exactly the motherly type, more a disciplinarian, than anything else. In our group of friends, there’s a mix of boys and girls, right. And we mix, like the hormone-fuelled adults that we are. But there’s a few who aren’t exactly the smoothest people. Rob being one. He doesn’t know how to be around girls. Like, it’s as he’s socially awkward in the prescience of them. It’s just, painful, almost, to watch.
And I am convinced, (but not necessarily right) that it’s because he never grew up with a standard female role in his life. And yes, it does seem to point to the obvious Nature-VS-nurture debate, but can I just ignore that for a minute?
I just think, he’s never learnt to smooth the edges out around girls. I’m just thinking, a child, acquired through whatever means, to a gay couple, will be mainly surrounded by either women(ala lesbians), or men(ala gays). So would this child not try be like the parents it idolises? So if a girl is brought up in an all male home, would she not be more likely to be a lesbian?
Now I AM FULLY AWARE that these are the views of those poxy family values again the filthy fags organisations. But it was just my thought, and I wonder does it make me anti-gay? Even though I am one? You cannot imagine my confusion!
2 comments:
Sam, it's a very interesting question. Briefly - I thought about it A LOT, and I think that I tend to disagree with you.
First, there is statistical data on kids in same-sex families, and the percentage of those that later identify as gay/bi/straight is the same as it is in straight families. Second, why do you think that a kid from a same-sex couple will mostly be surrounded by gay/lesbians? Besides straight friends (which we, for example, do have ;-)) there are numerous relatives, grannies etc. - just about enough to show the kid all the variety of behavior patterns...
By the way, you'd love the books by Dan Savage I wrote about recently - check them out!
I don't agree with u on this one. If I had a kid with my partner, he/she wud no doubt be spoiled. There's no denying that.
But, with my friends and family around. He/she would have a vast network of heterosexual role models. I can say with certainty that they wud play a role in the upbringing of my child, I wud want them to. As I have played a role in the upbringing of their child, and found it very rewarded.
And he/she wud have a supply of friends I approve of, on demand. That's a nice bonus!
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